Listening

Do you ever feel like you're talking to someone, but she's not really listening?



You say, "We're going to go to the grocery store after I do the dishes," and she responds, "How was the grocery store?"



Or, you say, "I'm allergic to peanut butter," and she says, "I love peanut butter, too. Shall I send over some of my homemade peanut butter cookies?"



Or, you say, "Do you like doing laundry?" And she says, "Have you seen any good movies lately?"



You get the picture. I'm starting to wonder if I a)talk too much or b)am boring!



There's one other option. c) People just don't listen very well.



My mom has always told me that people live in their own worlds, and what's important to them might be totally different than what seems important to you. So if someone is very upset because her gallon of milk will not fit in her refrigerator door, don't yell, "I can't even afford a gallon of milk and my electricity has been shut off so a refrigerator won't do me any good anyway!" Just remember that to her, it is important that that gallon of milk fit in the refrigerator door.



I got sidetracked. Lately, I feel like one or two of my friends just don't listen. I don't think it's malicious. I think they're just wrapped up in their own stuff. Maybe she's scrubbing pots (because her kitchen must stay spotless) and didn't hear me say that I'm going to the grocery store later. Maybe her kids are screaming and she didn't hear me say I'm allergic to peanut butter.



So I'm trying to be a little less sensitive.



But you can't do to your adult friends what you do to your two-year-old. When Big Boy doesn't listen, I say something like, "I really need you to be a good listener."



Say that to your 30-year-old friends and they might not talk to you again.



If Big Boy is REALLY not listening, I sometimes ask him, "Where's your good listening?"



His latest: "It's in that big tree over there." Or, "I ate it." Or, "I threw it out the window."



This kid's just a toddler -- but I think he's onto something.